How to Fall in Love (With Yourself) After Divorce

One of the reasons our customers reach out to us about timeshare cancellation is because they are going through a divorce. Big life transitions are a common reason for needing or wanting to get out of a timeshare contract, so if that is where you find yourself right now, know that you are not alone. Maybe the divorce leaves you needing to get rid of your timeshare for financial reasons, maybe the logistics simply don’t work anymore when splitting one week between two separate people, maybe you’re looking to just start again with a clean slate. Whatever the reason, we’re here to try to make the transition easier by taking all of the work involved with timeshare cancellation off your plate – so you can focus on something else. 

Divorces can be a stressful time. In fact, it is considered one of the most stressful experiences in a person’s life. On the Holmes and Rahe stress scale, divorce is the second most stressful activity on the list, scoring a 73 out of 100. So a timeshare isn’t all that you might feel like you’ve lost during a divorce. It can be easy to feel like you might have lost your sense of self somewhere along the way. You might feel like you’ve lost your old routine. Maybe you feel like your identity was deeply intertwined with your ex. Maybe you feel like someone else brought the magic into your life. After a divorce, it can be important to reconnect with yourself, to learn how to make your own magic, to fall in love again – with yourself. 

Falling in love with yourself can feel elusive though. There are many paths to the same place, and it’s going to look a little different for everyone. Here are some ideas that might work for you as you learn to reconnect with and fall in love with yourself after a divorce.

  1. Try Something Familiar 

What did you like to do as a kid? Did you love to dance around the house to your favorite band? Did you love to sing at the top of your lungs? Paint? Play sports? Art and crafts? Writing? Acting? Doing something you loved to do as a kid – something that you might have drifted away from as an adult – can be a way to reconnect with the part of you that might be feeling neglected. It can help you capture the feeling of being fully in the moment, that childlike sense of wonder and presence. It can be a way to connect or inch closer to a deep part of you, even if you maybe feel a little self-conscious at first. Reconnecting to the activities you used to love to do as a kid might help you remember who you are and what you love to do when apart from anyone else. 

  1. Try Something New

In addition to trying something you used to love to do, another way to fall in love with yourself is to try something new. Is there something you’ve always wanted to do, but never have? Maybe you always wanted to try photography? Learn to dance? Learn a new language? Write a book? Adopt a pet? Doing something that you’ve always wanted to do can be a way to be there for yourself. It’s can be a way of nurturing yourself and creating new experiences and memories that aren’t connected to anyone else.

  1. Be Kind to Yourself 

From how we take care of our physical health to the ways that we speak to ourselves, it’s important to be kind to yourself. Be as nurturing and giving to yourself as you are to others when building a relationship with them. Write yourself a love letter. Buy yourself something special. Celebrate yourself. Be your own best friend. Have your own back. Spend time with yourself. Be a good friend to you. 

  1. Affirmations

Studies have shown that affirmations can have positive effects on your behavior and health. Affirmations are the simple act of repeatedly saying or writing positive words about yourself. They are a small daily habit that can have some big effects. Affirmations can be a way to plant seeds into your subconscious mind about how you envision feeling about yourself and your life. Examples can be statements such as “I love myself,” “I feel joyous and fulfilled,” “All is well,” etc. You can read more about how to create affirmations for yourself here

  1. Journal

Writing in a journal daily can be another routine that can help you connect with yourself and your creativity. Studies have shown that it can also help with anxiety and depression and decrease stress. Spending time writing a few pages in a journal every day is one way to spend time with yourself, figure out what you are feeling, who you are, and process the various emotions that come with going through a divorce. 

  1. Boundaries

Another way to start to fall in love with yourself after a divorce is to create boundaries. It’s ok to say no to things you don’t want to do. It’s ok to want to spend an evening on your own taking good care of yourself. It’s ok to not go to a party if it’s going to make you upset or feel worse. Sometimes self-care is doing activities you love, and sometimes it looks like saying no to activities that you don’t. Saying no can be a healthy form of taking care of yourself and treating yourself with love. 

  1. Learn to Trust Yourself

Part of falling in love with yourself is also learning to trust yourself. It’s important to show up for yourself and to be able to depend on yourself. No one is perfect, but being able to depend on yourself can be a way to develop self-esteem and strengthen the relationship you have with the person you spend the most time with – you. You can do this by making small commitments or goals for yourself, such as saying you are going to take an hour for yourself this week – and then doing it. Another way to learn how to trust yourself is to speak kindly to yourself. It can be hard to trust someone who isn’t nice to you. It’s the same when that person is yourself. Try to be forgiving towards yourself, speak in a kind tone to yourself, and tell yourself nice things. You can be your biggest cheerleader. 

  1. Take Yourself on Dates

When looking to fall in love with yourself, it’s important to spend time with yourself. Developing a relationship with yourself is like nurturing a relationship with someone else. It takes time. Taking yourself out on dates is a great way to do this. It could be a night in by yourself watching a movie you’ve been wanting to see, cooking yourself an extravagant home meal, or laying out a blanket and reading a good book in the park. The possibilities are endless. The important part is that you are spending quality time by yourself and with yourself. 

  1. Meditation

Another way to connect with a deep part of yourself is to spend time meditating daily. A study at Stanford University showed that Mindfulness-Based Stress Reduction, a type of meditation practice, can help people with social anxiety disorder (SAD) with their self-image. Meditation can also help people develop a better relationship with themselves and treat themselves with more kindness. You don’t have to sit for a long time at first. It’s ok to start small, maybe 1-5 minutes, but as you stick with it, you may find that you slowly want to build up to longer sitting times. If you need a timer or want access to free guided meditations, you might like Insight Timer.  

  1. Motivational Talks

When going through a big life transition like divorce, it can be easy to get bogged down with heavy emotions or negative self-talk. Sometimes we need a perspective switch and to be reminded of our worthiness. Listening to motivational speakers can be a great way to remember your worthiness and develop self-esteem. Here are some TED Talks that might be a good place to start.

Summary

In conclusion, a lot of our timeshare cancellations customers come to us because they are going through a divorce and need to get rid of their timeshare. Maybe their timeshare has become too stressful to keep. Maybe it doesn’t make sense for either party to keep it in the divorce. Maybe it’s too hard to split one week up between the two of you. Whatever the reason, it is common to need to cancel a timeshare while going through a divorce. 

It’s not just your finances that have been intertwined with someone else. It can also be your identity. The good news is that there are many ways that you can reconnect with yourself and discover who you are again. From trying something you used to love as a child and experiencing something you’ve never done before to taking yourself out on dates and working with affirmations, you can start to build a relationship with yourself again. Just like when you’re building a relationship with someone else, nurturing a relationship with yourself takes time and effort… and you can do it. 

If you’re going through a divorce and want to cancel your timeshare, we can help. Timeshare Freedom Group has helped more than 15,650 satisfied customers and has been canceling timeshare for more than 10 years. If you’d like to schedule a free consultation with one of our timeshare cancellation experts, you can contact us here or call us direct at (866) 668-6872.

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